Everybody Loves Ralph

"The only legacy you really have in life is how you touched the people you have encountered. And his legacy is huge” -- Maureen Melillo about her husband, Ralph.

Democratic Town Councilman Joe Santino and Al Vollono are lifelong friends of Ralph Melillo. They grew up together. Played together. Went to high school together. Since Melillo fell ill last year, Santino and Vollono -- and countless others who have known and loved their childhood friend -- have been there for him in nearly every way. In the same way, people say, Melillo was always there for them.

Melillo was diagnosed late last year with a degenerative condition called cervical myelopathy and needs special medical equipment and care. (Click here for previous story.) So his family and friends decided to organize a fundraiser for the Allen Court man who is losing his ability to walk and talk. The response has been overwhelming, they report. People have donated money and stuff like designer sweatshirts, watches, restaurant gift certificates, a free day of golfing for raffles and a silent auction. The benefit will be held March 5 at Il Salice.

“It’s the least we could do for the kid. He’s a good friend,” said Santino. “The outpouring of donations has been unbelievable.”

Vollono is coordinating the drive with Melillo’s cousin Marianne Cesare. He said he had 440 tickets printed and he’s distributed all.

“The love that’s coming out of this is just unbelievable,“ said Vollono. “Ralph would do anything for anyone any time.”

Vollono recalled a very cold winter night two years ago when his oil furnace broke. He called his buddy Melillo and though it was 10:30 p.m., Vollono said Melillo came right over and unplugged the oil lines to get the furnace going.

This weekend, Vollono said he’ll take Melillo to two Yale hockey games, something the pals have been doing together for years.

“Ralph’s a humble guy. He’d give his shirt off his back to anybody,” said his wife, Maureen Melillo. “This (benefit) is a chance for him to see how many people he touched in a loving and caring way. He has no idea.”

She paused and began crying. “It’s a gift for him to see this while he still can. He’s always been selfless. It’s just his nature,” she said. “What’s happening now is he sees how he made a difference. The only legacy you really have in life is how you touched the people you have encountered. And his legacy is huge.”

Ralph Melillo said he‘s grateful for everything.

“My friends have been so supportive and have done so many things for me. I never thought I’d be in this position,” he said. “I’m so appreciative of all of them helping me. Reaching out to me. Visiting me. It just shows there’s a lot of love and compassion in this world.”

Here's what's been donated, so far, for the fundraiser, according to Vollono, Santino and Maureen Melillo.

East Haven Lumber: $1,500 worth of lumber. Friend Carmen Riccitelli, a retired East Haven firefighter, and his father are planning to build a ramp for Melillo.

Neighbors Dave and Alicia Teiderman: wheelchair, portable ramps and a Hoyer Lift.

Michael Anthony’s, East Haven barbershop: gift certificate for one haircut.

Miller Oil, East Haven: 100 gallons of oil.

The Rib House: East Haven: $50 gift certificate.

Sandpiper Restaurant, East Haven: $30 gift certificate.

The Deli, Short Beach Road, East Haven: $25 gift certificate.

Anastasio’s Italian Restaurant, Wooster Square, New Haven: two $25 gift certificates.

Ferrucci’s Italian Deli, Wooster Square, New Haven: two $25 gift certificates.

Salon Fusion, Branford: $50 gift certificate.

Home Depot, East Haven: a 10-piece pliers and wrench set.

Laurel View Country Club, Hamden: a pass for four for a day of golfing.

Adesso Moda, Hamden hair salon: a gift certificate for a manicure and another for a mani-pedi.

Fuda International, a New York City sportswear wholesaler: 18 designer hoodies. (Maureen Melillo’s sister works there.)

Ralph Melillo’s relative in Florida: 15-20 men’s and women’s Movado watches.

Friend from Georgia: autographed football by former New York Giants player Carl Banks; three Boston Bruins sweatshirts (one for Ralph Melillo, who is reportedly an avid Bruins fan; two for raffle).

Vollono said people can call him to make donations, ask questions or to find out how his buddy Ralph is doing, at 203.996.6406. He said he’s no longer selling tickets but folks can pay admission at the door on the night of the event.

The benefit will be held on March 5, from 7 p.m. to 11 p.m. at Il Salice, 11 Roma St. (near Memorial Field). Cash bar, Sal Annunziata and the Red Hill Rockers perform, DJ, raffles. $30/person.